Everyone Loves a Boston Girl

I can think of about a million ways I’m different from everyone else. But what I can’t think of is a coherent way to express these differences. We’ve been hearing it since kindergarten: “Celebrate your differences!” But really, we have no choice. Mainly, my thoughts are what make me different from you; my distinct ideas. And I’d have to write a novel to express this clearly to you.

So, like almost everything in my life, e.e. cummings can say it best for me:

“To be nobody but yourself in a world- which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else- means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.”

(in case you’re wondering, my favorite e.e. cummings poem is “since feeling is first” ["and kisses are a better fate/than wisdom...we are for each other: then/laugh, leaning back in my arms/for life's not a paragraph/and death i think is no parenthesis]. And “let it go.” But really, I love everything he does).

This post is in response to #reverb10 day 8, with prompt: Beautifully Different. Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful.

As a blogger, Bostonian, community manager, and human, I feel like I have so many different views of community. And I’m so lucky to have so many different communities interspersed in so many different areas of my life. But the most important community is and has always been that of family.

At the beginning of this year, my sister and brother-in-law moved right down the street from me. Literally, a 4 minute walk away. And while my sister and I have always been “close,” we’ve never lived near each other as adults. And though I’ve lived in Boston for 5 years without her, there’s something so comforting about knowing my big sister is just a couple blocks away.

I still often forget they’re living so close. But then I’ll get a phone call or a text saying, “wanna come over?” and it’s like “oh yeah, we can do that!” Between my boyfriend, sister, brother-in-law, it’s like we have our own little community. And while yes, we kinda have to love each other, we don’t actually have to like each other. And the older I get, the more I appreciate that we do.

And without the community of family, I have no idea who I’d be (of course, my parents are included in that community, too).

Wait. I said “sister,” not “Sister Wives.” That’s a whooole different kinda community.

OK, fine. That’s Community, too (The NBC show I sometimes find funny). Ugh.

This post was in response to #reverb10 day 7, with prompt: Community. Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010?

In 2010 I made priorities. And I’m not talking about big year-long goals and resolutions. I’m talking about daily priorities. Because I learned something very important: If you don’t label something a priority, it’s likely it won’t get done.

Now, I create various lists of priorities:

(1) Things I NEED to have done before going to bed
(2) Things I really WANT to have done before going to bed
(3) Things that can wait until tomorrow
(4) Things that can wait until I have time

Of course, work assignments, things that have deadlines, and things I’m getting paid for go into the first category. They always have (even before I knew I had these categories). But now I’d added other things, like blogging for We are not Martha. By making it a priority I ensure myself that I’ll always get it done. Though it’s not a “job” per say, it does make money (with the potential for more). And though I’m my own boss, I still set deadlines. If I put it in the first category I get it done. I’m wonderful at meeting deadlines.

Into the second category go things I’d really like to have done before going to bed, but don’t necessarily have to have done. This could include writing blog posts in advance or applying for freelance jobs that look appealing. Category 2 is tricky, though, because “want” is different than “need” and it’s easy to push wants aside. I find that I often don’t get category 2 things done. So if the tasks in this category aren’t done by the next day, I put them in the NEED category. Otherwise they’ll never get done.

I’m bad at doing things like making phone calls, sending cards, returning emails, and other tasks like that and I love putting these in the “wait until tomorrow” category. But I know this is a bad idea, so if things remain in this category for more than a couple days, I add them to the NEED category. And then they get done. Usually.

This all sounds so simple, right? Like, all I have to do is put my tasks in categories and I’ll actually get them done? But it works! I don’t go to sleep until I get the NEED things done. And if I want to go to sleep before 1 a.m., I know I better get stared on the leftover things right after dinner.

And that’s also why I just completed day #6 of #reverb10. Blogging on Love Boston Girl is always on the “things that can wait until tomorrow” category. Sometimes it moves up to the “WANT” category 2. But now that I’m participating in #reverb10, it’s in the first category, the NEED category. So, I get it done.

In 2010, I made priorities. And life got so much simpler.

This post was in response to #reverb10 day 6, with prompt: Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it?

People always say you know who your true friends are when times get tough. I believe the opposite. You know who your true friends are when times get good. You know who’s really there for you when you’re out of control happy and they’re out of control happy for you. It’s easy to be there for someone when they’re sad and down on their luck. It isn’t always quite as easy to be there when they’re flying high and have everything good going for them.

2010 was the year of letting go of having trouble letting go. If someone or something wasn’t adding joy to my life, I said goodbye. And I didn’t allow myself to feel sad about it. That’s not to say I didn’t allow myself to reflect, mourn, and attempt to understand. It just means that I came to terms with things and moved on. Because in order to find my own joy, I had to.

Life is too short to hold on to things that don’t contribute to your happiness. Things that, in fact, hold you back from happiness. In order to reach your fullest potential, you have to know when to let go. Shed a few tears and then call up the people who add positivity to your life and the world.

(Image from Story People)

This post was in response to #reverb10 day 5, with prompt: “Let Go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?

(Image from emcee Etsy shop)

Whenever I hear the phrase, “sense of wonder,” I can’t help but sing, “I hope you never lose your sense of wonder/You get your fill to eat/But always keep that hunger/May you never take one single breath for granted/ God forbid love ever leave you empty handed.”

So, there’s that. I’ve been singing that all day after reading today’s #reverb10 question: “How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year?” This is going to be a short one. Because it’s Saturday. And this question is way to broad. And loaded. Plus, I know a lady who can answer it for me.

Really, I cultivated a sense of wonder every day by opening my eyes. Trying new things. I’m not exactly a Lee Ann Womack fan (though more so than Rimes), but she kind of had the right idea. 2010 was all about keeping my hunger to succeed and move forward in life. I pretty much always got my fill to eat (literally and metaphorically, I suppose). And love never left me empty handed.

And perhaps my goal for 2011 will be to never take one single breath for granted. Because as much as I know I shouldn’t, it’s sometimes easy to get caught up in the moment and take things, people, and moments for granted. Especially the little things, which often end up being the most important.

So, yeah, there actually is that. Lee Ann Womack really did write this post for me. I just can’t say it better than she did.

And now I’m off to go do some dancing.