Everyone loves a Boston girl. This is the story of one Boston girl's adventures in the city, in blogging, and in getting through those crazy 20-something years.

I'm a writer by trade. And by passion. I'm a lover of food, friends, and all things Boston. I listen to music pretty much 24/7 and idolize Martha Stewart. I love my job(s), my life, and this city. Follow me on Twitter! @Susie

answers.

Posting has not turned into just a weekly thing, I swear. I know I say it all the time but ahh I’ve been so busy! And lots of stuff has been going on. Fun stuff, but also stuff that’s disheartening even to an eternally cheerful optimist like me.

I think I’m becoming more and more cynical about things like relationships and I’m not really liking that. I used to be all whoo hoo love! But recently I just haven’t been into the whole dating deal and find that I’d so much rather hang out with myself or my friends than be in any type of relationship. Clearly I’m not dating the right people to be so incredibly unenthusiastic about the whole thing, but what can you do? And when you see sadness all around you, it makes it difficult to stay positive about the whole thing.

This is totally the season for breakups and it’s extremely hard to see horrible stuff happening to everyone all around you, especially people you love. And as much as I’ve tried to give advice and come up with answers, I’ve realized that I don’t know. I just don’t know. I don’t know what it’s supposed to be like. I don’t know what’s normal and what’s not. I don’t know how many chances you give someone. And I don’t know when you’re supposed to call it quits. I don’t have a clue. I know what I’ve done with my experiences. But I have no idea if I did the right thing or not. I personally think it’s a hell of a lot easier to be broken up with than it is to break up with someone. But maybe that’s just the horrible indecisiveness in me talking.

You can go through all kind of experiences, but you’ll still never have the answers. I don’t like not having answers. When people come to me for help or advice, I like knowing exactly what to say. I want to make things better. But I think it’s OK not to have the answers all the time. What fun would life be with them? It wouldn’t be much fun, but it also wouldn’t be so horribly painful. I know everything will work out; it’s just a tough road getting there.

9 Responses to “answers.”

  1. me & them Says:

    I feel you. I suddenly feel like I’m so blase and cynical about love/relationships etc. I was always the girl who wanted to get married – and thought i’d be first – but I’m strangely worried I don’t think I could be with the one person for life. SCARY.

    I wish I had answers, for myself and everyone else. I guess it either comes with time, or you just learn some way to deal with the unknown.

    Smile sweety :)

  2. Damsel in Digress Says:

    ah, i just wrote something about that feeling where you just don’t *know* … where the answers seem to be missing.

    it can be so hard trying to give people the right advice when we don’t even have the right advice for ourselves. i like how honest you are in this. sometimes i’ll give advice that i think is the right thing to say – maybe if i examined that closer, i’d have to decided that i’m not so sure about what i’m saying.

    i think, and i hope to not be the jinx by saying this, that it’s exactly when you feel the way you describe that something can happen to completely sweep you off your feet one way or another. i know that’s how it happened with me.

    anyway. it’ll take a really special guy to deserve you =)

  3. L Sass Says:

    When did you graduate from college? The springs two and three years out of college for me were RIFE with a lot of college / just after college relationships getting married or breaking up. (Often the latter, heartwrenchingly.)

    It can make you depressed, to be sure.

    I think enthusiasm for dating comes in fits and spurts. Just cause you’re not that into it right now, doesn’t mean you won’t be again. And, you know, sometimes the cliche is true–when you’re focused on having fun with friends and pursuing your own projects and hobbies, good things happen!

  4. Katelin Says:

    I definitely agree with you on that one. no matter what you experience or go through i’m pretty sure we’ll never have the answers to figuring it all out. we can just hope we’re doing something right every once and a while.

  5. Therapeutic Ramblings Says:

    I’m with ya too. Heck, I just wrote about
    Craigslist: Casual Encounters
    because once I stumbled on it, I started looking for decent ones. How far I’ve fallen….LOL!

  6. Paula Says:

    I hate not having the answers to things either – how are you meant to know whether you did something right or wrong and therefore learn from your mistakes if you just DON’T KNOW! It’s so frustrating. But I guess if something hasn’t worked out, we know we did SOMETHING wrong. Or, more likely, that the OTHER PERSON did…

  7. The Tranquil Doorman Says:

    I also hate not having the answers. What bothers me even more than that is when I give advice that I know I wouldn’t follow. It’s not that I wouldn’t follow it because I think it’s wrong, but because I’m rarely one to use my head and I try to give sensible advice.

  8. brookem Says:

    it’s hard when a heartbroken friend comes to you and you can’t just make things all better for them. that has to be one of the toughest feelings in the world… but like anything else, you cant get around the emotions, all you can really do is go through the experience to get through it.

    and, it’s tough meeting decent (good haired, layered, funny, witty) men in boston. it just is.

  9. SocialSecurity Says:

    You need to read my last 2 posts. I swear I wasn’t plagiarizing you…I will just say…I think I know how you feel…

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