Everyone loves a Boston girl. This is the story of one Boston girl's adventures in the city, in blogging, and in getting through those crazy 20-something years.

I'm a writer by trade. And by passion. I'm a lover of food, friends, and all things Boston. I listen to music pretty much 24/7 and idolize Martha Stewart. I love my job(s), my life, and this city. Follow me on Twitter! @Susie

losing a friend.

Martha Stewart’s dog, Paw Paw, died and for some reason I am really sad about this. Paw Paw (and Martha’s obsession with animals) was one of the main reasons I first started liking Martha. Hey, I was like 14 and had no interest and cooking or any of that Martha Stewart stuff, but I was in love with dogs. Paw Paw looked like a little lion and Martha was always talking about him. Whenever people would say Martha is “cold” or “bitchy,” I’d argue with it because if you’re really cold and bitchy, you don’t have that kind of compassion for animals.

I really feel for Martha because I know exactly what it’s like to go through the death of an animal you’re so close to. A lot of people do, but it just feels really personal when it happens to you.

I was the kid who got bit by dogs every other day because I annoyed the hell out of them. I was the kid who went to MSPCA camp just to play with the dogs. I read Dog Fancy at age 7 because I wanted to learn everything possible about dogs. I grew up with the best little dog in the world and maybe I’m slightly biased, but I have never met an animal as good as she was. She died when I was 11 years old, and you know what? I still miss her intensely sometimes.

Peaches must have had nerves of steel to put up with me. With never so much as a growl, she sat while I dressed her in jewelry, sunglasses, scarves, and hats. When anyone asked me who my best friend was, I said Peachy. She came in my room and sat with me every time I cried. I fell asleep with my face buried in her fur while she sat in her “spot” at the top of our stairs. I never ever saw her bear her teeth at anyone. She never jumped or barked at anyone. Not the best guard dog in the world, but the most amazing companion.

I strongly believe that part of my childhood was defined by that dog. I would not be the person I am today if it was not for her. The day that she died was the most painful day of my life. I do count myself lucky that I’ve never had any human close to me pass away, but they really would have to be pretty close to me to make me feel the same pain I felt when Peaches died.

I’ll never forget when my parents told me we were putting her to sleep. I flipped out. They waited until the night before to tell me because they knew I would be far less than OK. They told me at the dinner table, and I immediately screamed that I hated them, called for Peachy and locked myself in my bedroom with her. My parents tried to explain it to me. And I knew they were right. I knew it wasn’t OK that Peachy wouldn’t walk up the stairs anymore. And that all she ever did was lay around. I knew it wasn’t fair to make her go on living like that. But I couldn’t accept it. I tried to run away with Peachy that night, but I didn’t get farther than the back yard before my parents came and got me. I spent the entire night awake and crying.

The next morning, the vet came to my house. Peachy hated being in the car and we didn’t want to put her through that in her last hours. She had her head in my lap as the vet gave her the shot. I will never forget the look in her eyes. I’ll never forget looking at my dad and for the first time in my life, really seeing him cry. The vet left with Peachy and my family just stood there crying and hugging each other. This is what a broken heart feels like. This is what it’s like to lose your best friend.

We still talk about her all the time. If we have something for dinner that she would have liked, we call her name to the table. My dad still finds the bones she buried in her backyard. We laugh about the time she ate the bouquet garni off the kitchen table. And when she’d disappear and then return hours later covered in burrs. My family never got another dog. I think we knew none would ever be as good as Peachy.

I think people too often underestimate the power of pets and how they can enrich our lives. Peachy gave me that kind of inconditional love that nobody could ever match. And who couldn’t use that sometimes?

Me and my little pup. In the home-made frame I made at MSPCA camp. Try to ignore the wallpaper in the kitchen.

20 Responses to “losing a friend.”

  1. ToKissTheCook Says:

    Every damn day I get less and less surprised that we are friends. I had Toby. A big sheltie. Who was the biggest love of all time and yes, I also know a sick amount about dog breeds.

    Puppy LOVE.

  2. kimberlie Says:

    ahhh, my childhood dog is still alive and kicking! (well, kind of) He’s a 17 yr old Spaniel and im not sure he has much left in the tank. He’s great though and im sure i will blubber when he goes..

    p.s- cant ignore that wallpaper!

  3. Shelley Says:

    I used to love watching Martha when that animal dude came in… you know the one that always had a macaw stuck on his shoulder? Did he have his own show after awhile? Hmmm…

  4. Maxie Says:

    Awww your dog was so cute. My dog got hit by a car 3 years ago when some little kids called him across the street. We have a new dog now, but it’s just not the same.

  5. Jenn Says:

    I want a puppy 🙁

    I must say, for someone who knows little about html, your blog is looking fabulous! I really like the blue you chose for the background.

  6. Sara Says:

    i think that’s my favorite blog you’ve ever written!

  7. bunny Says:

    That’s such a precious picture of you and Peachy. I also enjoy the homemade frame it’s in. I always think the dogs I’ve had and secretly grin remembering their loyalty and seemingly permanent “smile” on their faces. Awww.

  8. Ashley Says:

    Aww your peachy was precious. I am the same way with dogs and cats. When my childhood golden retriever passed away when I was 19 it was so heartbreaking. I can’t imagine losing any of my parents animals now, even though they don’t live with me they’re my babies and I’d hate to lose them.

  9. Julie Q Says:

    awwwwwwwwwwwwwww, i’m in loser denial when it comes to dogs getting old. My Rocco is turning 4 next month, and will live to he’s 105… I saw that Martha newsticker too and immediately gave my dog a big hug and scratched behind his ears.

  10. Daddy Dan Says:

    That was a really nice story, Susie. Dogs are truly the best. You’ve made me want to go home tonight and give our two dogs a little more attention than they’ve been getting lately.

    P.S. I’m with Kimberlie, it’s very difficult to ignore that wallpaper!

  11. Heidi Says:

    seriously that story brought tears to my eyes. i’ll never forget my childhood dog, my dad and mom got rid of her when they got divorced. I was so heart broken, i’ll never ever forget the day we brought her back to the shelter that we had gotten her from a few years earlier.

    i can’t fathom ellie getting old, and have no idea what’s going to happen to boyfriend and i many years down the road when the day we have to put her down comes. guh.

    love love love puppies 🙂

  12. Lizzie M Says:

    That post definitely made me tear up–how kind of your family to have the vet come to your house instead of having to take Peachy in the car.

    it’s so hard losing a pet, and I was so sad about Paw Paw, too–I think she was actually just on Conan talking about him (maybe a month or so agao).

  13. nicoleantoinette Says:

    I’ve never had a pet and always felt like something was missing.

    Totally unrelated- your blog layout looks GREAT! I’m impressed 🙂

  14. Nina Says:

    Aww this post almost made me start crying. I think some people do underestimate how much dogs can enrich our lives and how painful it can be when we lose them…although most people who have had a dog seem to get it. I cant wait to spend the week with my puppies!! Hopefully they will be on their best behavior for you friday night 🙂

  15. Peter Says:

    Sara stole my comment!

    But, this reallly was such a sweet post. Loved it.

    (And congrats on getting the html cleaned up.)

  16. Slightly Disorganized Says:

    I love my little dog so much already, and I know exactly where you are coming from.

    puppies are the best.

  17. L Sass Says:

    What a gorgeous puppers. I still feel surprised and sad when my childhood dog isn’t at my parents’ house when I go home. Dogs make such wonderful friends!

  18. Michelle & the City Says:

    such a great post!

    i just finished reading marley & me and this post made me think of it. you should definitely read it if you haven’t already, i think you would LOVE it 🙂

  19. Therapeutic Ramblings Says:

    I still dream about my dogs, mostly my 3rd dog, because he was always a calming presence. I’m a huge animal person and I can’t wait until I can afford to properly support some animals.

  20. SavingDiva Says:

    I lost my childhood dog about 7 years ago…and I’m just now ready to get another dog…

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