Things that happened last night (Tuesday night) in list form:
-Sara and I had an innocent dinner at Ma Soba, eating sushi and sharing a bottle of wine. See? The evening started off classy.
-We then went to The Hill where we promptly ordered 2 more bottles of wine. Because one just wasn’t enough.
-Disappointed that the pizza place was closed, we went to a majorly sketchy Chinese restaurant and pigged out on scallion pancakes and chicken fingers (after being so healthy with sushi). Sara also ordered vodka and sodas for us, but thankfully we did not drink them.
-While at the bar in the sketchy Chinese restaurant, we yelled at every person there, demanding to know why they were there and where they came from. I got into a really heated political debate with a 45-year-old man with a moustache (Ron Paul? The Patriot Act? I have no idea). I think I talked to his friend on the phone, ew. I also attempted to take pictures of everyone at the bar. I think they hated us.
-We accidentally left sketchy Chinese restaurant without paying. To be fair, I don’t remember getting a bill and we chatted up the owners our whole way out the door. It’s not like we were trying to hide anything.
-Somewhere between sketchy Chinese restaurant, running up and down the streets of Beacon Hill, and arriving back at Sara’s, my wallet went missing. I didn’t notice until this morning. After spending 15 minutes panicking (and wondering how I could call sketchy Chinese restaurant to ask if they had it without getting caught for not paying), I received a call from the police at my alma mater. Allegedly they had a pile of cards that were mine. OK. I was nowhere near my old grad school last night but somehow someone brought the goods from my wallet (minus the cash and the actual very cute wallet) to the police there. They tell me it was a homeless man. He says he found them on the street, but I kind of hope he was the one who took the money and then had a conscience and turned everything else in. That would explain why the culprit chose not to take my Victoria’s Secret gift card. Or the AAA card. It does not, however, explain why they took my pink, extremely girly wallet.
-Sara fell in the middle of the road and had trouble getting back up. I tried to help her up but was laughing WAY too hard.
-We ran home. I slept at Sara’s. Thank God. If I hadn’t, I would have taken a cab home and tried to pay the cabbie with my non-existent money.
I learned that it is a very dangerous thing that Sara is now unemployed like me. Something tells me if we both had normal people jobs, Tuesday night would have never happened. These are going to be some very dangerous times for us. I probably should make sure I get a job ASAP.
Enjoying our sketchy but free Chinese food.