Not so sure how I feel about being 25. It’s such an awkward age. When I was little, I used to say I would have babies at age 25. YEAH RIGHT. That is far, far, far away. Anyway, despite my anti celebrating getting old, I have the best friends in the world and they are making me celebrate my birthday all day long. Starting with lunch at the Metropolitan Club in Chestnut Hill. And ending with a night out in Boston. I’m so lucky to have such a great group of friends (many of whom I’ve been friends with since I was 7!). I couldn’t ask for better. Unfortunately, I’m the first of us to turn 25, but many of them are not far behind.
My favorite thing about today, so far, is the happy birthday e-mail my dad sent me
Let’s plan on dinner.
Check out this blog on handbags: http://www.bagsnob.com/
hehe. I love that he saw bagsnob.com and thought of me. He knows me all too well!
Sometimes I think the hardest part about breaking up with someone is breaking up with their family. When you’re dating someone for a significant amount of time, you tend to grow close to the people they’re close to. So, when you stop talking to the person you were dating, it’s like you’re breaking up with their whole family as well. Except you usually don’t have any hard feelings against the family members. And just like that, they’re gone from your life.
My ex-bf had (and still has, I suppose) an amazing family and I grew pretty close to them throughout our relationship. Because they lived near my college town, I spent a lot of time with them and they became like my second family. Throughout the ex’s billions of injuries, surgeries, and hospital visits, I was there like one of the family, sitting in waiting rooms with them and trying to lessen his pain and make him feel better. They let me use their car to come back and fourth from campus to their house and later from Boston to their house. His mom would call me at work and ask me to check up on him. They cooked me dinner and asked me to help. Incidentally, the last time I saw my ex was at his grandmother’s extremely emotional funeral, where I sat in the church in the front row with the four of them. This was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done, because while I never felt more like a part of their family, I also knew our relationship was over. And there I was, being there one last time for someone who never quite knew how to be there for me.
I usually don’t talk about stuff like this here, but I’ve been thinking about them a lot lately and how much I miss having them in my life. Family is so important to me and sometimes I think it’s really hard to find someone who also feels this way. You always hear stories about evil in-laws and I just can’t imagine ever not getting along with my significant other’s family. Of course, I have my own family with whom I am extremely close to, but sometimes there’s nothing like having a second family who you know loves you and cares about you even though they don’t have to. The only problem is how transient these relationships can be. It can’t be unconditional love like it is with your own family because when push comes to shove, parents have to support their own child.
Breakups are really difficult even when you know they’re right, because it’s not just one person you’re losing, it’s a whole group of people. Sometimes I get the urge to call my ex’s mom and see how she’s doing. But I’m pretty sure this would be violating some sort of unspoken code or something. It’s weird to see pictures of his little sister and how much she’s grown and realize how long it’s been since I’ve seen her. But I guess this is just a part of life and how it goes. People aren’t always meant to stay in our lives for the long-term, but I think we learn a lot and gain something from every person we encounter. Life goes on, and new, and hopefully even better, people come into our lives. Maybe even to stay.
O.K. I’m done self-pitying and am getting myself in a better mood for the weekend. I’m just depressed I’m getting “old” and am being over-emotional and lame. I promise I’ll cheer up.
If you had $1,000 and you could spend it on anything you wanted, what would it be? Maybe you’d plan a little trip. Or possibly you’d purchase that really nice bag you’ve been eyeing. Maybe you’d even want to spend it on a new laptop. But chances are you wouldn’t choose to spend it on bills from your doctor’s office. Oh, but that’s what I just did. I’m still thoroughly confused as to why I enrolled in and paid immense amounts of money for an insurance plan that does not cover “routine services.” But I think it was probably because that’s the plan my school enrolled everyone in, so why my ish wasn’t covered is beyond me. And it’s perfectly clear that the insurance company is not going to offer any information to me. Oh, hell yes I will be writing an appeal. In the meantime, I took out my credit card and paid the frigging bills. Yay credit card points.
God, I love splurging. I mean, as if it’s not already enough fun to get a physical, a “healthy woman exam” (as the insurance lady called it), an HPV vaccine, and blood drawn. Given $1,000 I would no doubt choose to spend it on needles being stabbed into me and such. Honestly, this makes me really mad because I am perfectly healthy and did not NEED to get any of this done right now, but was proactive about my health and figured I had the insurance, I may as well use it. Or else I would have waited until ooh say NOW, when I’m paying over $200 a month for an amazing insurance plan that actually covers stuff (I think, but obviously I don’t know much). I’ve never had a health emergency in my entire life, but always go to my “routine” appointments, so I probably would not have knowingly paid for insurance that only covers emergencies.
Well, I guess I’ve learned my lesson, which is to always read every single freaking packet and piece of paper your insurance company gives you; and if you don’t understand a word it says, ask someone. Don’t trust that because your school is offering the plan, “it must be good.” Don’t let your doctor convince you you need blood work done and you need a vaccine right away. And don’t trust the lady who works in your doctor’s insurance office who signs a little piece of paper saying your vaccine is covered. She doesn’t have a clue. Nor does she care; the one grand isn’t coming from her pocket.
Well, I’m off to go dream about what I could have done with $1,000. And pray that my new insurance covers the $400 for my second vaccination on Monday. I miss the days when my dad handed me an insurance card and dealt with all the paperwork, bills, etc. I almost cried on the phone today with the insurance lady. And then the Lahey Clinic lady laughed at me when she asked for my account number and I said, “Which one?! I have like eight bills in front of me.” At least the Lahey Clinic is a teaching hospital…hopefully they’ll put my life savings to good use.
Honestly, as if icanhascheezburger.com wasn’t bad enough, now I’m cracking up over lolsecretz.com, too. I hate my sense of humor lately. Don’t know what’s wrong with me or why I’ve become so easily amused. I don’t want to laugh at cats. I don’t even like cats.
Growing up, we had a family friend who gave me cat gifts for every holiday. We never figured out why. She knew I had a dog and was obsessed with it. When I went to her house, I was obsessed with her dog. We never talked about cats. Yet, it was always cat-related presents. One time it was a wooden cat that was meant to hold my mail. I don’t know. Another year it was a ceramic cat with a rhinestone necklace. Then one year the cats just stopped. Thank God. Now it’s weird ponchos and earring holders. Maybe I secretly wish the cats would come back. If I had a cat I would take its picture and sent it to icanhascheezburger. Or lolsecretz. I might get a cat just so he can be a model. lol.
It really bothers me when reality shows kick contestants off every week. In some cases, it’s OK, like American Idol, for instance. If you suck as a singer, you shouldn’t be there. And obviously, they have to get down to a winner, so they weed out the worst until they get to the best. I understand this. And on the Bachelor, it’s OK because if he doesn’t like you, he doesn’t like you. And he kicks people off until he eventually gets to his favorite bachelorette (seriously, isn’t this how everyone finds the love of their life?). Again, I can see the logic. But on shows where everyone starts off sucking at something and the point of the show is for them to improve, I feel like it’s totally counterproductive to kick someone off. Especially after the first week. These people need help! If anything, they should kick the most improved person off. They at least have a better chance of surviving alone in the world. But the person who is still the worst? They need to be on the show the most.
I was thinking this tonight as I was watching Beauty and the Geek. The guy who got kicked off was clearly in need of some serious help. That’s why he was on the show in the first place. So, what? They give him a couple days to be on the show and then they say “Time’s up! You fail. Go home.” Hardly seems fair to me. Will he go home and say “Wow, I am so geeky, I couldn’t even stay on a show called Beauty and the Geek. I should just give up now”?? Because I’m pretty sure I would. Who makes these rules? I felt the same way when I was watching The Pick Up Artist (I swear, I only watched it once. Mystery freaked me out. And I have a life. Sort of). Why are they kicking off the poor little guy who still can’t for the life of him pick up a girl? Weren’t they supposed to help him? I’m sure that will raise his confidence level the next time he’s out at a bar.
But the kicking off of contestants especially bothers me when it comes to the weight loss shows. The contestants are there to lose weight, but if you’re a little slower at dropping pounds than the others, you’re going to get kicked off. So, you’ll probably go home, get depressed, and sit on your couch eating ice cream, cookies, and Hershey’s bars for two weeks straight. I mean, you’re too fat to even remain on a reality show specifically produced for fat people. How does that make you feel?? Hello, NBC (And CW, VH1, etc.); you act all like you want to help people but do you even give a crap about them? No. You just want ratings. So, the fat get fatter, the awkward get more awkward, and the geeky get geekier. Yet, I still watch…and what do I get? Probably just dumber.