Boston can be sooo weird. Don’t get me wrong, you know I LOVE the city and wouldn’t want to live anywhere else. But an afternoon on the commons is enough to make you wonder where the heck some of these people come from. A sampling of the unique things we saw between the hours of 3 p.m. and 6 p.m:
a) Way too many couples lying on the commons making out. Love is a beautiful thing, but since when is it acceptable to lie in a public area, tangle yourself up with your partner, and make out? I don’t care how good looking you are, nobody wants to see that.
b) A man in a business suit, baseball hat, and sunglasses attempting to discretely smoke a joint (but not very successfully as I was quick to notice him) while he listened to his portable radio . Again, when did it become acceptable to smoke joints in public areas? I wasn’t aware.
c) A man just randomly collapse. May have been drunk. Park rangers (what’s the purpose, again?) ran over to him, 2 ambulances, and a firetruck show up. Took unresponsive man away in ambulance.
d) Way too many people asking for money for their charities. Including a man claiming the purpose of his foundation was to fight racism. When we didn’t give him money, he yelled at my friend (who is black) and told her she may as well be white. Wow dude, you’re doing an excellent job at ending racism. See, you don’t even need our money.
e) A man who was either drunk or on drugs wandering around, sitting in weird positions, and basically doing calisthenics , i.e. spreading his legs as far as possible and lying down. Yuck. (see image below…if you dare)
f) Two girls in their twenties repeatedly hitting themselves in the abdominal area and chanting in some sort of ritualistic manner. The pounding went on for 20+ minutes and makes me wonder if the girls will ever be able to have children after basically punching themselves in the ovaries over and over. They also did other pilates-like moves and said things such as “shake it off, shake it off” and “I love my body, I love my body.” Then they rubbed their faces and said “I love my beautiful face” over and over again. It seemed to be some private self-esteem building class…or something like that.
g) While waiting to use the bathroom at Burger King, a woman telling us all about her abdominal troubles, using graphic language, claiming she couldn’t hold it, rubbing her huge stomach, and un-buttoning her pants before she even entered the bathroom. Ew.
And probably a lot more that I chose to block out as one can only take so much weirdness for one afternoon. Something for everyone in Boston, my friends.
This is how the man was lying. Click picture for full zoomed-in version. It was bad.